Ho, ho, ho. And just in case you think the above photo was taken during a stint of hotsy-totsy Florida weather, let me state right here and now that the mercury at the time I snapped this snap was pushing a paltry 40 degrees and the wind was blowing 20 knots and gusting higher. Sure, such conditions are not especially noteworthy to the snowmobilers of Big Piney, Wyoming or the folks shoveling snow in Lake Traverse, Ontario. But hey, they certainly knock the wool socks off us Florida Panhandlers, although weather's not the point of this entry, to be truthful...I've got something else up my sleeve.

Betty Jane's a beaut, ain't she? I mean, with the wreath and all? And she's about to become even more beautiful, thanks to yet another boat improvement project I've got in the works.

Now, some of my friends and associates think I'm a little obsessive about this sort of thing. They contend, for example, that there are few, if any, other boat lovers  kickin' around the docks these days who will clean and refurbish an antiquated fiberglass holding tank with as much devotion, care, thoroughness, and poetic reverence as yours truly. And lemme tell ya, once I'd prized off the fitting on top of the tank (with the corroded pickup tube hangin' down) I was absolutely flabbergasted to discover...

But then again, let's just skip the intricate details of that particular extravaganza in observance of the warm, cheery, turkey-dinner-laden spirit of the holidays and get on with exactly and precisely how Betty's gonna become even more beautiful than she is in the near future.

The story starts just a week ago when my wife (and Chancellor of the Exchequer) B.J., declared that, as a Christmas present, she was willing to turn loose of a significant sum that could be used to upgrade the exterior vinyl cushions that have been mouldering away on Betty's flying bridge since shortly after Captain Cook sailed into Sydney Harbor.

B.J., I am guessing, was responding to my application of steady pressure concerning the subject  of new cushions for literally months now. That's how you get new stuff for your boat, you know. Steady, gentle, long-term pressure upon the Chancellor of the Exchequer!!!!!!!!! It's easy. A poignant comment here. A bit of sad reflection there. While eyeballing the part or area of the vessel that requires replacement or upgrading. And again, of course, that steady, glacial, inevitable,juggernaut-like psychological pressure.

Should I do a separate blog entry or column on the Machiavellian aspects of boat ownership, I wonder? Or have I done so already? Hmmmmmmmm?

Anyway, Jones Upholstery is working on the job right now. And I will report on how everything turns out--what the whole deal ultimately costs me, the vinyl I chose, why I picked the particular shop I did, etc.--in the Upgrade section of the March issue of Power & Motoryacht.

You can tell Betty's fairly excited about the prospect of brand-new cushions, I think. Check out the photo again. I swear, boats are just like people: love 'em and they'll love you back!

Happy Holidays!